Reflections
by JasnaSunshine88
Summary: Set of 4x2 drabbles Nikita's and Michael's  , written in 1st or 3rd person.  Scenes from Game Change, Knightfall, 343 Walnut Lane and London Calling.


Hello my Nikita peeps, this is my 1st time posting FF on this site (but not 1st time writing) so forgive me if there are any mistakes. Also, this set of drabbles is un-beta'd, so if there is any mistakes, it's all mine. Oh yeah, English is not my 1st language (Serbian is).

Sooooo... i don't own Nikita. Or Mikita (only Nikita and Michael are mentioned in this drabbles). It is first Nikita's and then Michael take on happenings from that particular scene. If you read it i am sure you will get it.

_NOTE_: maybe you will cry or have that uncomfortable sensation in your throat/stomach.

**(Michael and Nikita hug, 'Game Change')**

They were together. Michael and Nikita. Nikita and Michael. Soul mates. Bonnie and Clyde.

But she was still insecure. Insecure because of everything they've been trough. Insecure because of everything that can happen.

'I can't lose you. I don't wanna lose you.' She whispers, her vulnerable eyes looking at him, begging. Begging what, she doesn't even know.

'You won't lose me.' He whispers back, hoping that what he said is the truth.

* * *

><p>I can see she is insecure. Of course she is, after everything that we have been through. All that 'i-will-kick-your-butt' , 'i-am-not-afraid-of-anything' vibe she gives off is just that – vibe. Something to confuse you with. In reality, she is very delicate and fragile, things that sometimes make me afraid for our relationship.<p>

'I can't lose you. I don't wanna lose you.' She whispers to me with such a hope in her eyes, almost making me cry. Cry for everything i feel for her. She is still the only person that can reduce me to weeping like a baby. If even only in my head.

'You won't lose me.' I hope that is true. I am dead without her anyway.

**( end of 'Knightfall')**

'_No. He is not dead. He can't be. No.'_ She thinks while gasping for air, air burning with smoke from explosion.

Without him she is just an empty shell, empty and hollow. And she knows that.

When she sees him exiting the smoke wall, she runs for him and just break down in his arms. Arms that were holding her tight, even when he wasn't there. Never letting her go.

She is crying. Sobbing. Praying that she will never lose him.

* * *

><p>She thinks i am dead. She thinks i left her. Left her all alone in this ugly world.<p>

She was on verge of breakdown when i exited hiding place Ramon told me about. She was broken, and it broke my heart to see her like that. It was all my fault.

I hug her tight, praying that she will never have to feel like she lost me again.

**( end of '343 Walnut Lane' )**

He let go of her hand. It was like if he let go of the heart That strange grimace on his face telling her everything she needs to know.

She is scared. Scared that she just lost him. The only thing that mattered. The only thing that makes it all worth.

And now that thing is gone. He is still standing in front of her, but he is gone, and she will maybe never get him back.

And that scares the hell out of her.

* * *

><p>I let go of her hand. I couldn't cope. Thing she said changed my life forever. No escape from this. And i want none.<p>

I have a child. My kid. Little 5 year old boy.

Her eyes are vacant, looking through me. Looking empty.

And that scares the hell out of me.

**( end of 'London Calling' )**

This pain is killing her, ripping her heart open. She can't live like this – no, this is not a life. She can't bear living without him, but, under these circumstances, living with him is even more painful.

She will let him go, but if she lets him go, will he ever come back?

* * *

><p>He fights. It is a verbal one, the one he is not best at, but he is still trying.<p>

She wants to leave him. She wants to go away so he can figure out his life. Thing is, she just doesn't understand that his life is standing right in front of him.

He was scared. Scared that he just lost her too, like everything in his life. Everything he ever cared about.

But if she leaves him, will she ever want him to come back?

THE END

* I love reviews :)


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